Being a woman is very difficult and it always has been. Sure, things have definitely improved in many areas of the world but there are still a multitude of men that think they are entitled because they are males. This absolutely disgusts me.
I was fortunate enough to grow up in a very progressive area where I didn’t have to deal with men harassing women very often. I was also just a child and extremely naive but there seems to be a lot less sexism where I grew up when compared to other places.
I never really understood when people said that women were a minority when growing up because I didn’t see a difference between the way women and men were treated. It wasn’t until recently that I started to realize how fucked up the world is. I was sheltered my entire life and I always hated my father for that but was this what he was protecting me from? My senior year in high school there was an incident but until now, I didn’t realize that there is a good amount of men that believe they are superior to women.
Being a woman never really seemed like an issue to me but being fat was. I know I constantly talk about how I’ve been fat my whole life but it has really affected me. I can’t remember a time in my life that I wasn’t made fun of for being bigger than everyone else but I began to close myself off and try not to care. The past few years I got to the point where I accepted it. I didn’t like my body but I accepted the fact that it was just the way it was. A few months ago one of my friends made a comment about how big I was and that was the first time in awhile that it hurt me.
Since starting a romantic relationship I have had a lot of difficulty with my insecurity of my size. Luckily Dave supports me so much. He sees that my size bothers me and he is really helping me make a change. I am so grateful that I am in such a healthy relationship with someone that really cares about how I feel and he isn’t pushing me to change because he wants it for himself.
There aren’t very many people that make comments about how big I am but I can always see them judging me by the way they look at me.
Back to being a woman…my friend that I mentioned above about making a comment on my size recently reached out to me. He was wondering if I thought that the program we are in at school is more catered to men than women. I told him that of course I thought that (we are in a program that will bring us into an industry that is male dominant). In order to be treated like the men in the program, I have to work my ass off and prove myself while the men just have to show up. I told my friend that I didn’t find the program being catered to men weird because that is how the world is. He then became very hostile and was mad at me. I tried to explain that being a woman and seeing certain things and experiencing certain things can lead me to believe this fact. He then said that I was being biased and that he was only asking for my opinion about the program. If he didn’t want my honest opinion then he shouldn’t have asked for it. (Also before this incident we got into a discussion about veganism. He told me that I had to eat 20 avocados in a day to get enough protein. Whenever he asked me a question I gave him an answer with the information that I learned from doing my research. I backed him into a corner and then he said “whatever I don’t really care”).
The point of this post is because I just got into an argument with some sexist men on twitter. I saw a post that someone wrote, tagging a vegan page that I follow. The post said “MEAT RULES”. While I can’t deny that I once thought the same thing, I also wouldn’t go around harassing vegans for their lifestyle choices. I looked at the guys twitter and he was harassing multiple vegan accounts and being very rude. I ended up commenting on his “MEAT RULES” post being my sassy self. Then he began to tell me that veganism is communism. His friends came to the post and started attacking me. They called me “Stalin” and a “Nazi”. I was merely explaining that veganism is about being healthy. When you become vegan and eat a plant based diet, you feel better and become healthier. When you cut out animal products, you are saving the lives of animals. When you cut all of these things out you are also helping save the environment.
Of course these men started calling me “woman” and acting as if they mattered more than I do. They said that things were the way they are because “God made it that way”. Then one guy said “didn’t know vegans were fat”. His friends began to like his comment and this frustrated me so much. I know that some people are just total dicks but I think it is exceptionally ridiculous when you fat shame someone, especially if you don’t know their story. I became vegan to become healthier. I’ve lost ten pounds. I feel insanely energetic. I just wish that people weren’t so terrible. I am doing everything I can to be healthy. I rarely experience that kind of hate thrown at me but I can tell you that after I have experienced so much hate for being fat in my life, that one really hurt a lot. I know that I don’t need to explain myself to any of these rude people but if they were being treated the same way, they wouldn’t appreciate it.
Facing people like this right now is especially hard. Whenever something upsets me, Dave has been here by my side and he has made me feel better. He makes me feel special. He makes sure that I know that I am special and I am so beautiful in his eyes. Since he is away at boot camp I feel so alone. I just wish that I could hear his voice and bury my face into his chest.
Society really sucks. It allows men to gang up on one woman and makes her feel defenseless. The sad thing is, no matter how far we think that we come, there are always going to be men that think that they have all of the power.